i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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