I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Randomize
