Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
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