Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
