I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
