she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I just want to make out with him forever
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Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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