My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
love makes seman taste better
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
