I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
