garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize