sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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