all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Randomize
