I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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