Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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