turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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