Screwed.edu
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
