I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Its about making memories worth repressing
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
