I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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