Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Alive.
So much puke
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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