highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
