I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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