how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize