as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
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