You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
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I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
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I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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