so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Even my vagina gasped.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
