dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i wish my penis had a tongue
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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