I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize