when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
