So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Randomize
