at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Randomize