if you like me you must not know who I am
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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