I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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