I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
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