i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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