did you get engaged???
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
