he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So much rum. So many feels.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
