Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
