it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
