What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast