Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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