what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Randomize
