Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
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