my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
