Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
