Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Randomize