if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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