I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
