I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
