just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Randomize
