My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
