It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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