I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Randomize
