I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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